Tuesday 15 November 2011

All My Little Ponies. (What d'ya mean red dead ain't a riding sim?)

The Horses in Skyrim are shit.

I understand, horses and ponies are hard to animate, and almost impossible to balance. Having played skyrim for a couple of hours only I managed to amass the 1000g needed to buy a very beautiful stocky nord horse. It was beautifully animated, and stood in it's pen behaving as I have seen real horses do. It made the right noises, it moved in the right way and I WANTED IT. I had had bad experiences with in game horses before so I saved before buying her, climbed aboard allie and watched to my dismay as she walked at human speed and sprinted slower than my character could. Crap. A reload then. Added to this, riding instantly forced me to go into third person, so all the practice I put in was useless. I couldn't use a two-handed weapon whilst riding, so my beserker was essentially slowed and disarmed all because I was silly enough to try and ride a horse. I do however understand bethesda's logic. Horses are powerful. In game there is the option to steal the animals. If they went too fast the thief would be unstoppable, so instead the horse becomes as useless as the famed 'horse armour' of Oblivion.
All in all I give the Skyrim horse 3/10.

There are at least two ways to counteract this discrepancy, one is to time-lock the horse until you reach a certain level or you play for a certain amount of time. This was the method used in Harvest Moon: Back to Nature. Not only was this the best version of the farm simulator it had one of the most balanced in game horses. You can receive your steed simply by activating an event in the first month of your arrival at the farm. The animal is brought to you by a neighbour but is too young to be ridden. So for one in game year ( around 25 hours of playtime) you must tend to the foal, brushing him everyday so that he loves you. When next spring comes around if your neighbour is pleased with the horse's progress he gives him to you. In this way, the instant excitement of having an animal on your farm is coupled with the waiting game in which you grow attached to all its pixels. This tending process is rewarded with a horse who can not only be ridden but also acts as a moveable shipping box which allows the crops you harvest to be sent to the buyer (Really useful in game). The horse also unlocks a horse racing mini-game to be played once a year. The soft-lock on the horse is perfectly designed to be as satisfying as possible to the player and in the end getting the steed feels like a reward for the love and attention you put in.
8/10

Another method of locking out a horse from the game is to control the rarity of good horses. This is illustrated brilliantly by Red Dead Redemption. Red dead is easily the best horse riding simulator I have ever played. I understand that other people played it for the action, the story and the adventure and whilst all of those things were great it was the horses that kept me playing in the closing acts of the game. Once I had completed the main story I stopped fast travelling altogether. I rode and rode and rode the length and breadth of that country, because it was more fun than fast travelling. The horses were balanced, only by unlocking new areas would new breeds reveal themselves, this meant that you might steal a horse and still feel the arm of the mounted law. The mini-game for breaking horses was also an interesting and important addition which added a challenge to unlocking new and better steeds. The horses are well characterised: they throw aggressive riders, and respond well to an apple or two if they are in the mood. Every atmospheric moment I had in game, every heart pounding moment, every blissful bit of reverie was on the back of my horse. 10/10

Being a girl gamer I have played A LOT of Pony/horse sims. For the most part they were utterly without merit. But the game I enjoyed most was Mary King's horse riding star. The game play was super fun and challenging. In fact I may just pick it up off ebay for £2. 6/10

A couple of missing examples:
Epona: 7/10.
Ponyta/Rapidash: 1/10
All MLP games to date: 5/10 O.o